Heaven's gift or Hell's curse?
by Gothgirl3000
Summary: Harley takes a potion by Poison Ivy which creates another Harley. The Joker is pleased by this but will he come to regret it? HarleyxJoker, Harley&Harley vs Joker, Joker vs Ivy (Batman Adventures)-Lemon scenes later
1. Chapter 1

Harley was sat on Ivy's couch and in deep depression. They had had yet another argument on how Harley was never around when he needed her for something important.

"How you holding up honey?" Ivy said walking in with 2 bowls of chocolate ice cream. She handed one to Harley who took it gratefully.

"Ok-ish Red" Harley said sadly.

Ivy sighed heavily she hated seeing Harley so down but most if all she HATED how Harley would crawl back to that slime of a man called The Joker.

Harley spooned ice cream into her mouth and smiled a little as she savoured the taste of the chocolaty goodness entering her system.

"I don't know HOW you can put up with that Jerk" Ivy grumbled crossly.

"But red you don't understand he didn't hit me this time honest he was just mad" Harley explained.

"Yeah what's new he's only pissed off about something" Ivy said crossly. Every time she had seen the Joker he was either pulling wise cracks or abusing Harley.

"He said he wished there were 2 of me then he could get stuff done faster" Harley sighed heavily.

Ivy smirked deviously "Y'know Harley I may just be able to help you with that". Harley smiled as Ivy led her into her lab.

**_In lab_**

Ivy picked up a test tube filled with a purplish-pink liquid "Here drink this it's my new duplication formula" Ivy said handing it to Harley.

"Gee thanks red you're the best" Harley said cheerfully "Well bottoms up" She said and took in one.

"It'll take effect after midnight so if I were you I would hurry home if you want to surprise The Joker" Ivy said smiling.

"Ok thanks red you're a real pal" she said heading outside and made her way home.

Ivy smirked "Enjoy your present clown coz after this you'll never take Harley for granted again" she said deviously.

**_Later that evening_**

Harley made her way upstairs to the bedroom on tiptoe and closed the door behind her. She pulled off her hat and mask then removed the makeup and pulled out her bunches.

"Your home late" A voice said from behind her to which she turned and saw The Joker in the doorway. He looked a little pissed off but pleased to see her.

"Puddin!" Harley cried happily and leapt into his arms and kissed his cheek "Didja miss me?" she said hopefully.

The Joker smiled "Of course I did Pooh this place aint the same without ya" he said patting her head.

Harley wrapped her arms around his neck "I missed you too Puddin red is fun but she aint got much humour".

"I don't think the weed even knows what a joke is" The Joker said chuckling.

"I was just off to bed Puddin did ya want something?" Harley said slightly worried.

"I just missed my Harley-girl is all" The Joker said kissing her and then walked to the bathroom "When I come back you better have stripped" the Joker teased.

"Yes sir" Harley called and began stripping her clothes off and pulled her red lingerie nightgown from her drawer.

**_a couple of minutes later_**

The Joker left the bathroom and smiled deviously at the sigh in front of him.

Harley was wearing her red lingerie nightgown her long blonde hair falling to her shoulders. She had one hand behind her head and the other place neatly on her hip "Like your present Mistah-J" Harley cooed.

"Love it sweets" the Joker said walking up to her and slamming her onto the bed.

**_meanwhile_**

Ivy was taking a shower enjoying the hot water spraying her skin. She smirked at the thought the Joker would have in the morning.

"He'll never complain about Harley again" Ivy sniggered her green eyes twinkling mischievously.


	2. C2: Double Diamonds

The Joker was laid in bed on his side. He reached out to touch Harley then realized she was gone. He sat up and saw Harley wasn't in bed to which he frowned with a puzzled look.

She had probably gone to the bathroom or grabbed a midnight snack but the bed was cold so she had been gone a while.

"AAAAAAHHH!" Harley screamed from downstairs.

The Joker bolted up and ran downstairs. He was still in his vest and purple boxers with green flowers "Harley what's wrong?" he yelled rushing downstairs. He almost collapsed when he found her.

There were 2 Harley's stood staring at each other with scared and afraid expressions. They looked exactly the same but only one was the original.

"Mistah-J why are there 2 of me?" Harley said worriedly.

"You imposter get out of here!" The other Harley yelled angrily clenching her fists.

"Who are you calling an imposter!" Harley snapped "I'm the real Harley!" she said fiercely.

The Joker stared at the 2 women. They may have both been Harley but only one was the original and his little Harlequin.

"Ok there are only a few things that I know Harley would be able to do" he said folding his arms "So we're gonna have a test in order to see who's the REAL Harley" He said firmly.

"Ok Puddin" the two Harley's said simultaneously.

"First is boob check" The Joker said firmly. Although he was doing this for perverted reasons this was a crucial test.

Harley walked forward and The Joker groped her chest a little then felt them in a more grabbing manner.

"Ok you next" The Joker said pointing to the other Harley who was pouting.

The second Harley came forward to which he groped her chest and frowned her boobs were not as big. He KNEW Harley's boobs were the 2nd most important thing to her next to him and Ivy was third.

"Ok important question who is more important ME or the weed" He said smirking.

"Mistah-J" Harley said.

"Ivy" The second said.

"Your Harley" He said taking her in his arms and hugging her.

"But how?" The second said crossly.

The Joker smirked folding his arms "My dear I know Harley I MADE her so the only thing that she should love more than anything is ME" he said firmly.

"Aw Mistah-J" Harley said sighing happily.

"So where did you come from anyway?" The Joker said curiously.

"I see my formula worked" Ivy said appearing from the shadows.

"Red?" Harley said looking confused.

"Oh it's the weed big surprise the Joker said crossly.

"Harley you idiot don't you remember what you asked for" Ivy said folding her arms crossly.

"Huh?" Harley said blinking innocently.

Ivy face palmed herself "You WANTED a duplicate of yourself so the clown would be happy!" Ivy snapped.

"Oh yeah" Harley said remembering their conversation.

"Well you did a crappy job Pam she aint nothing like the original" The Joker said crossly.

"EXCUSE ME!" Ivy raged "She's PERFECT!" Ivy snapped.

"Hey they may both look the same but yours has glitches" The Joker said proudly.

"Like what?" Ivy said looking worried. If her clone was defective she would have to destroy it.

"For starters her tits are too small" The Joker said crossly.

"Yeah my boobs are bigger than that Red you've seen em often enough when we took a bath" Harley said crossly.

"Hey I aint a mind reader!" Ivy snapped defensively.

"She aint as flexible" Harley stated proudly.

"What makes you say that?" The Joker said curiously.

"When we were fighting before you woke up she did some acrobatics and she wasn't as perfect with her techniques as I am she made mistakes" Harley pointed out.

The other Harley frowned crossly glaring daggers at the Harley with Joker and walked up to Ivy clinging to her for comfort.

"Yep that's a clone" The Joker said firmly "MY Harley is devoted to ME and not some weed" he said smirking.

"Ivy's nicer anyway" Harley 2 said smiling.

Ivy patted her head gently "Good girl" she said smiling.

"Well she'll come in handy on missions but until then Harley will have to wear a different costume" The Joker said firmly.

"But WHY Puddin I like mine" Harley said sadly.

"Pooh she's gonna wear a costume similar but with a different design" The Joker said patting her head.

Ivy sighed "Well I'm off back home I'll come pick up Harlequin in the morning" Ivy said waving goodbye.

"Whose Harlequin?" Harley asked curiously.

"Your clone" Ivy said pointing to the flat chested Harley.

"Oh...But that's too confusing just call her Black Diamond" Harley suggested.

"Why?" Ivy asked.

"It's less confusing and besides I don't want a clone using MY alias" Harley said firmly.

"I second that" The Joker said agreeing.

"Whatever I'm outta here" Ivy said walking away.

"Bye Red" Black diamond called happily.


	3. C3: Benefits and problems

"Harley you got everything doll?" The Joker called as he counted the money in the sacks.

"Sure did Puddin" Harley called back lovingly.

"Any sign of Bat-breath?" The Joker yelled crossly.

"Nope. It all clear Mistah-J" Black Diamond called loudly.

"Good stuff" The Joker said pleased.

Black Diamond/Crystal Quinn was proving to be somewhat useful but a pain in the ass at times. Her outfit consisted of a black leotard with a white diamond on the front and 2 wings on the back. On her feet were a pair of black ankle boots and her hair was styled into 2 bunches. Her weapon was a giant black and white striped bow staff. She wielded it well and as cute as she was he often sent her packing to Ivy's place until he needed an extra pair of hands.

Suddenly The ceiling gave way and Batgirl, Robin and Batman landed in the middle of the floor.

"Well if it aint the bat" The Joker chuckled then he peered at Black Diamond crossly "I TOLD you to keep an eye out. Harley does a better job than you ya dumb broad!" He snapped.

"Sorry Mistah-J" Black Diamond said apologetically her bunches drooping.

Batman's eyes widened and he was in state of disbelief. There were 2 Quinn's but how? Was the Joker that crazy he would make 2 of her!

Suddenly Harley leapt into the van and turned on the gas pedal. She turned to The Joker "Mistah-J lets go!" She cried.

The Joker slammed the car boot shut and leapt into the front seat. He flashed a large grin at Batman "Later Batsy! Let's do this again REAL soon!" he jeered as the car sped off.

Black Diamond was about to flee when Batman grabbed her by the arm "Hey what gives!" She snapped angrily.

"Not so fast I want to know your connection to Joker" He said firmly.

Black Diamond frowned but knew she had no hope of escape. He was a better fighter than her and she had no weapons. She placed her hands behind her back and allowed herself to be arrested.

"You wanna know my background? Ask Red" Black Diamond giggled.

"Ivy? But what's she got to do with you?" Robin said suspiciously.

"You'll see but you gotta ask HER. I aint telling you nothing!" Black Diamond jeered.

Batman frowned and tossed her in the trunk. She was irritating and nothing like Harley. The REAL Harley was smarter and acted more human; this one was stupid and obedient.

"So where we off?" Batgirl asked.

"To pay a visit to Ivy. I'm sure she'll know more about this Harley clone" Batman said firmly.

"I hear ya. If anyone would know the history of her would be Ivy. But why not Joker I mean he MADE her" Batgirl asked suspiciously.

Batman smirked "Joker is very vain. He likes to keep originals because he MADE them. Having a clone would be like owning a fake, a copy" he explained.

"Basically stealing his idea" Batgirl said firmly.

"Yes" Batman said and started the engine.

As they sped off Batman began to wonder what intention Ivy had in mind by making a clone. She was very attached to Harley and could not understand why she would simply clone her.

**_at hideout_**

The Joker was lying on the bed. He was relaxing and counting the stolen money; he felt rather proud of himself for slyly getting rid of Black Diamond. She had been cute there was no denying it but Harley was best.

Harley was sat at the end of the bed and counting a wad of money. She was wearing her Harlequin make-up, Domino mask and jester hat but had removed her Harlequin suit. Instead she was wearing her Red Lingerie nightgown.

"Harls..." The Joker said firmly but in a gentle tone.

"Yes Mistah-J?" Harley asked curiously.

He sat up and slowly pulled her onto his lap taking her by surprise. He could feel her trembling but her body was so warm and soft.

"You were jealous of Black Diamond weren't you" He chuckled deviously.

"Don't be stupid" Harley lied. It was true she had been jealous of her clone and wanted to get rid of her from day one.

During the time she had been around; black diamond had pestered Joker during work, during his relaxation time and when he was trying to sleep. She had made sure Harley was out or unaware and made a point to pick on her.

"You know you're the only one for me Harls. Your much prettier and sexier than that dumb ass clone the weed made" The Joker cooed and blew into her ear.

Harley shuddered with excitement "You mean it Mistah-J?" Harley said quietly.

"Harls...I MADE you. I of all people should know how perfect you are" The Joker said firmly.

Harley turned and nuzzled into his chest. She loved having him all to herself and she would never share him.

The Joker patted her head and smiled "You little baby" he teased.

He had a few reasons of his own though. Harley was clingy but she respected his authority and personal space. She did her best to please him and in return earn his affection and gratitude. She was smart, cunning and seductive something she had both been taught and carried down from her days as a doctor.

Black Diamond was annoying, demanding, selfish and a cry-baby. She was disobedient and spoke back. She had earned a few beating as a lesson since she had started to live with him and ran to Ivy for comfort. She wasn't as sexy during intimacy and fell asleep half way through most days. She was too dependent on him and was a daydreamer.

"Does Daddy's little Harlequin want some attention?" he teased tickling her chin.

"YES! I've been so lonely since that bitch arrived!" Harley cried bitterly her eyes filled with jealousy and angry tears.

"As you wish Harls. You were always number 1 to me anyhow" The Joker said pushing her down.

**_meanwhile at Ivy's_**

Ivy was sat on the couch reading a book about herbs and plants and how to turn them into medicine. She was drinking a cup of herbal tea and wrapped in a blanket enjoying her evening.

"RED!" Black diamond cried rushing into the room.

"Diamond? What's up aren't you with Joker?" She said worriedly and placed down her book.

"It was awful red! Mistah-J left me behind and ran off with the REAL Harley" She sobbed.

"That Jackass" Ivy hissed angrily. It seemed since she had been leaving the clone at The Joker's place he had been very neglectful towards her and abusive.

"I've been a good girl I just wanted some attention" Black Diamond sniffed.

"I know, but he's a selfish prick and doesn't know what a woman wants" Ivy cooed gently.

"Speak for yourself!" Batman said firmly from behind them.

"BATMAN!" Ivy snapped crossly.

"Relax Ivy we aren't here to arrest you. We're here about her" Batman said pointing towards black diamond.

"Black Diamond? Why what's she done now?" Ivy asked suspiciously and shot a cross look at Black Diamond.

"How was she made? Joker is way too proud to make a clone and you're the only one who likes Harley enough to do it" Batman explained.

"Is that an insult or a compliment?" Ivy teased mischievously.

"Just tell us!" Batman snapped crossly.

Ivy got to her feet and black diamond hid behind her nervously "I made her from Harley's blood and some plant genetics. She IS Harley but just not as powerful as the original" she explained.

"That's it?" Batgirl said rather shocked.

"Why did you think I made her for criminal purposes?" Ivy asked defiantly.

Batman and Batgirl looked away but it was obvious they had.

"Thought so. Now if you don't mind I would like to enjoy the rest of my evening in peace" Ivy said firmly and pointed to the door.

Batman headed towards the door but shot Black Diamond a suspicious look.

Batgirl followed but turned to Black Diamond "We'll be watching" she said firmly.

After they left Black Diamond let out a sigh of relief "Boy that was close I thought old bat brain was gonna beat me to kingdom Kong".

Ivy hit her around the back of the head "You idiot! You couldn't have been more sneaky when returning?!" She snapped.

"Sorry red I didn't mean to" Black Diamond sniffed.

"I know just be more careful" Ivy sighed crossly.

"Yes ma'am" Black Diamond said quietly.

"Good girl" Ivy said gently and hugged her. She wasn't at great as the original but she still loved her.


	4. C4: Jealousy among rivals

**Hi! Sorry for not updating for a while but I've been rather hectic with college work and other issues**

**Hope you like the new chapter and will try and update soon**

**Love Ya'll**

**GothGirl3000**

* * *

Harley and Joker were curled up together on the sofa watching cartoons. It had been a long evening and they were chilling out while coming up with new evil schemes.

Harley was wearing a red spaghetti tank top, Black lace panties, Her clown make-up and Jester hat. She was enjoying being romantic with Joker as it did not happen very often so she was savouring every moment.

Joker was wearing a white vest and Purple boxers with green flowers. He was exhausted from their last fiasco and was enjoying this quiet time with his lover.

Bud and Lou were curled up at the end of the sofa on the carpet. They were fast asleep and enjoying the peace and quiet instead of loud noises.

Suddenly they heard the sound of a car screech into the back alley confusing and annoying them. They never really did much romantic stuff as a couple so being interrupted was not a very enjoyable thing.

"Looks like we have unwanted company" Joker muttered crossly.

"Wonder who it could be?" Harley said curiously nuzzling into his chest lovingly.

Eventually loud footsteps were heard in the alley and the front door slammed open surprising Bud and Lou.

"JOKER!" Ivy raged angrily slamming the living room door open.

Joker raised an eyebrow but looked amused "Well if aint the weed come to whine to us about your plants being mutilated?" He chuckled deviously.

"MISTAH-J" Black diamond whined anxiously from behind Harley.

Joker frowned crossly. He had hoped to saddle her with Ivy permanently but apparently that was not happening.

Harley frowned crossly. She had wanted to get rid of her rival but apparently she had other plans. Slowly she pressed herself against Joker's chest and wrapped her arms around his neck to show dominance over him.

Why the hell are you ALWAYS dumping Crystal with me?" Ivy demanded angrily.

"Yeah don't ya want me no more?" Black Diamond whined.

Joker sighed heavily "It's not that I don't WANT her it's just I already have a perfect Harlequin" he retorted sternly.

"Aww Mistah-J" Harley cooed happily.

Joker smiled and kissed her cheek fondly. He didn't need 2 Harley's one was more than enough.

"Well I have to go to the Amazon for ingredients. I don't trust her to not mess up so YOU can take care of her" Ivy retorted sternly.

"WHAT!? No fair!" Harley raged angrily.

"Goodbye!" Ivy said crossly ignoring Harley's complaints and slammed the door behind her crossly. It was obvious she was growing weary of Diamonds attitude but would NEVER reveal this.

Joker said nothing but just sat and frowned crossly. He had no need for 2 Harley's but it seemed Ivy deemed otherwise.

"Yay! Now I'll be able to spend more time with you Puddin" Black Diamond giggled happily.

Joker said nothing but held onto Harley even tighter. He was not one for copies as he found they tainted the purity of the original.

Bud raised his head slowly and peered at Black Diamond. He began to growl quietly under his breath which made Harley feel a tad better.

"Move over Blondie I want some time with Mistah-J too!" Black diamond yelled angrily.

"You snooze you lose bitch!" Harley sneered.

Black Diamond pouted crossly and sat on the armchair and glared at them. She was VERY pissed off about being rejected by her lover.

Joker hated catfights unless it was Harley against Batgirl but in this case it was more irritable.

"Harls I'm ready for bed you coming?" He said playfully tickling her chin.

Harley smiled cheekily "You bet Mistah-J" she said lovingly.

"Can I come too?" Black Diamond asked curiously.

Joker was about to say no when he thought of something amusing and very naughty. A large grin spread across his face "Sure you can sweets..." he said deviously.

"But Puddin!..." Harley whined crossly.

"YAY!" Black Diamond cried happily.

Joker smirked "But..." he said deviously.

"But what?" Black Diamond said worriedly.

"You have to OBEY. Any disobedience and you can sleep outside!" Joker snapped sternly.

A cold shiver ran down Crystal's spine. She was worried that he may be telling the truth; the other half of her thought me may be joking.

Harley saw her uncertain look "Believe me he aint kidding" she teased.

Black Diamond swallowed nervously "I...I agree" she said quietly.

"Good to know..." Joker said cheerily. He then turned to Harley "...Time for bed Harls" he said lovingly.

"YES SIR" Harley and Black Diamond said simultaneously.


End file.
